My worst worst worst ever waste-of-time-and-money movie is... FIRST DAY HIGH.

My friends and i wanted to watch it because the song of Kamikazee really kicked in - "nasasabik sa unang araw ng eskwela / taas kamay with confidence / let's do the FIRST DAY HIGH!" And we all know there's the sosy high, the rebel high, the brainy high, the MVP high and the nice guy high. Also, this was when High School Musical of Disney came out and we heard it was going to be something like that so we got curious.

But yeah, curiosity killed the cat. First scene and we were like "what." they sang and danced - it was the worst. Trying hard... like they always say. Mga Pinoy talaga! Singing was bad... those actors and actresses don't even sing!! and dancing was... well.. they kept repeating steps. at first the choreography was okay but then we kept seeing it over and over again and it just bored us to death.

the story was weird! it was so far-fetched, shallow and surreal. they tried too much to link the different kinds of "high" that it worsened the whole movie. They tried to make it look, sound and feel TOO much like High School Musical. It was really bad. Even the conflict of Troy and Gabriela in HSM they adapted to the romance of Kim and Gerald in First Day High.

Masyadong pilit - that's the tagalog phrase to describe it. They forced it too much that even if singing wasn't good, they still did it. Why present something you know the audience won't appreciate?? (yes, everyone who watched it didn't like it. even the lady who sells movie tickets in Glorietta!) Well... i guess that's the Filipino way. They always make actors and actresses sing and dance even if they know they really can't. ugh.

No more Filipino "musicals" for me. Maybe i'll stick to Filipino love movies instead. HAHAHA!

CENTER STAGE is my all time favorite movie.

I know, so expected. But, i love it because...

i can relate to it entirely. it reminds me of what i love and what keeps me sane.

it makes me love and appreciate even more the people i dance with, the relationships we've built and all the memories we've painted permanently in our hearts.

i love the dancing in it. the movement. the drama. and even the tiny bit of romance...

... i've seen it a million times! i can practically recite the whole movie. :p

to my forever baby brother,

it's my last day here - it makes me sad thinking that i'll be away from everyone and everything i love. but i just had to do one last thing - no, not go out with friends if that's what you think. and it's not to watch my favorite ballet dvd's you hate either. it's just that.. i didn't want to leave with you thinking and feeling i don't love you. i didn't want to leave with you not feeling loved.. by me.

i know i've been a very masungit and impatient ate. but hey, we've had our good times too. i know i hate it when you make lambing - give me a surprise hug or back rub... but hey, it's only because i don't feel i deserve them from you... being the arrogant ate i think i've been. i don't think i can return to you the amount of care you give to me. i know you always just remember our younger years. when i was 7 and you were 4. when we were both in rosemont and i'd get mad at the boy who bullied you. i remember pointing my finger at him and making him cry. i don't know why i've lost that channel of affection to give or show you. i'm sorry.

everytime you ask my help for your homework, i'm flattered. i try to be patient, i try to understand your needs, but i dont know. im just so short-tempered. like you always say, mana nga ako kay mama. i feel ashamed when you are so kind to me and i hardly return it. just yesterday you saw how tired i was from a whole day's rehearsals, and you willingly made my bed for me to sleep in. i had no words come out of my mouth. how can you be so caring and loving to me when im not like that to you?

im sorry. i really am. if i could rewind the past years, i'd control my temper and be as patient and sympathetic. but hey, i always remember you when i do the groceries right? i never forget to bring you home your favorite kitkat white - one for you, one for me and we always eat it together. i will never forget and will always be thankful for our late night kwentuhans in the room before we sleep. we'd turn the lights off and make kwentuhan until we fell asleep. we'd talk about anything and everything. you'd open up about your friends, your love life. and id do the same. sometimes we'd hurt our stomachs laughing our heads off remembering the punch lines from rush hour or the silly anecdotes of mama. we're partners in crime always laughing at mama; making fun of her. but hey, that's our lambing... right? we're partners in crime in disobeying house rules - the 15-min only phone calls, the 30-mins only on the internet, the no chatting while doing work, the no watching tv on school days. hahahaha! we've gone agasint them all... plenty of times.. huh?

i appreciate you bearing with my never-ending kwentos about my friends, about boys, about problems. sometimes i feel you're the older one. sometimes i feel i have two kuyas tuloy. two kuyas i can run to and talk to anytime anywhere. you always have time for me... ALWAYS. and i am more than thankful for that.

if anything, you've been the most unconditional loving brother. anyone would want a brother like you.. im sure of that! my friends scold me for being so mean to you.. but, i dont mean to be mean. im sorry. if anything, you've been a kuya to me. i always keep your insights in my mind and try to reflect on your advice to me. if anything, you've been my best friend. although i hardly ever show it, you have been and will always be. i know you get jealous of my friends sometimes, but you'll always be more important than them. remember, blood will always be thicker than water. thanks for always standing up for me. for always showing you love me despite how mean ive been. thank you for not telling on me. for always getting mad at me when i make takas. thanks for being my friend. my brother.

again.. im sorry. but know that i will always be that 7 year old ate who will stand up to anyone who bullies you. know that i will always be that ate who will listen and suffer with you. know that i will always be that ate who will hate that girl who broke your heart. know that i will always be your ate. and i will always love you.

love you, tsong! you will always be my baby brother. =)

If you could ask God just one question, what would it be?

Why do you love me when I cause so much pain?

If you could ask anyone (dead or alive) a question, what would you ask and who would it be?

I'd ask Michael Jackson: why did you have all those plastic surgeries? do u regret having them done? and how do u feel about all the controversies about you?

i know it's supposed to be only one question. but i can't help it. i'm too intrigued. haha! :p

I interviewed my dad. :)

1. What was the funniest thing I did when I was a baby?
- marami eh! when we were all busy, we'd leave you in the floor of the family room. before we knew it, you had the newspaper and you'd carefully take out all the pages one by one. and in a span of a few minutes, all the pages were surrounding you in a circle. same with mama's wallet. you'd get it from her bag and take out her money bills one by one and put it aorund you.

- one more really funny thing you'd do that we couldn't do anything about was that you'd get super duper gigil that your face would get red and you'd just start squeezing miguel's face really hard until kuya miguel would cry. but he couldn't do anything back to you so he'd just keep punching the couch out of pain and anger.

2. What was my first word?
- your first word was mama. but your very first expression that we understood was when you'd cry really really loud with a red face coz you were angry.

3. What was my first food/favorite food?
- pear puree. you'd never stop eating that.

4. What was the craziest thing you did when you were a student?
- my frontmate and i were joking other people around. nag-aasaran. then he stood up coz he couldn't stop laughing. when he was about to sit down, i pulled his chair as a joke so he fell butt first on the ground. after that he shut up out of embarassment.

5. How did you and mom meet?
- it was martial law that time and we were out already, so we couldn't go home anymore or else we'd get caught and be jailed. so my friends and i (one who happened to be your mom's cousin) went to the birthday party of your tita betty (mom's older sister). i met her there. so if it weren't for martial law, mama and i wouldn't have met.

6. If you could do anything other than what you are doing now, what would it be?
- if i were only a few inches taller, i would never have sighted P&G. instead, i would have joined PBA - to be a hotshot, famous basketball player and shooter like our local Danny Seigle of San Miguel Beer.

7. Tell me a secret you kept from your parents.
- i never told them about the girls i'd date. they'd just find out sooner or later. i never openly told them or talk about it with them.

8. Tell me something about you that I still don't know.
- i tried smoking when i was grade 3. ate monique's ninong (tito vinny) who was my childhood friend and kapitbahay told me to meet him around 12mn at our common bakod. i was grade 3 and he was grade 5. we stayed there and then he brought out a pack of cigarettes and got me to smoke. but i didn't like the taste and i said i wanted to be an athlete so i've never held a cigarette since then.

"Who Am I?"

Funny how this is such a simple question; but yet the hardest one to answer. I can't answer this with one word or one sentence alone. I am seen as a different person by different people. Just like any of us are -- we are like prisms. Pne object reflecting different colors -- I am one person bearing different personalities; all of which contribute to my whole being.

Just like a regular 17-year-old would, I too, spend eight hours of my day inside the red brick walls of my school Woodrose. Although it seems like only yesterday that I had my first steps into this one huge school, it's been 11 years already. 11 years of studying, 11 years of a diversity of teachers -- some of whom I've built relationships with. 11 years of laughter. 11 years of friendship. I've been through so much in these red brick walls -- all of which, although I refuse to admit, have molded me into the best person I can be today.

My instrument is my body. I am a dancer. Dancing helps me relieve stress. Dancing is my escape. Dancing makes me happy. It's been eight years since I started ballet and I've been enjoying every minute spent in the studio. Academy One, my oh so prestigious school, is my second home. My ballet friends and teachers are my second family. Ballet helps me focus. Ballet makes me strong. Ballet is discipline. Ballet makes me believe in myself. Had I not started ballet, I don't think I'd be as resilient as I am today.

Most, if not all, memories worth keeping are those with my friends. They're the reason I laugh. They're the reason I have fun. They're the reason life is more enjoyable. Imagine highschool without friends -- that's just so sad. I am a friend to those who appreciate me. I am a friend to those I am grateful. I am a friend even to those I don't really get along with. We all try to make more friends and at the same time, make ourselves better friends to others. It's a process for life -- as much as we want to, we can never be a perfect friend but we can always strive to be.

I am a sister. A baby sister to my two ates, a maturing sister to my protective kuya and a concerned ate to my younger brother. I love my siblings -- we are the 5 M's! Monique, Monina, Miguel, Margarita (me) and Mateo. No matter how wide our age gaps are, we all relate to each other; we have special bonds. Ate Monique is the role model among us. Ate Monina is my twin! Kuya Miguel is the protective one when it comes to boys and Mateo is the one who opens up to me the most. We are each others' guardian angels -- really.

If I am a sister, then of course I'm a daughter too. To my dad, I am still his baby girl he can carry on his shoulders. To my mom, I am still her 8 ounce baby she can lullaby to sleep. Unfortunately for them, I'm 17 years old now. I try my best to make them happy. I try my best to show them my gratitude. I try my best to make them proud of me. Yes, I am the daughter of Manolo and Marie, but most importantly, I am a daughter of God. And that in itself should be enough to make me proud. (Okay, it's cheesy... But true!)